(Please scroll down for English version)
過了兩星期的冬假我們在電話旁苦苦守候了兩天，以為在 Poole 的機會已不復再，殊不知一個unknown call改寫了我們的命運。
當初卡話要辭工時大家都半信半疑，我都諗住要節衣縮食好一段時間才會揾到工，點知海軍都未出晒糧就已經有四份工搵上門，重有兩份confirm咗。一月中佢本身個last day 都未到就可以開新工。我地係蘇格蘭搵屋時都只係諗住物價平啲啲錢見洗啲，但點知又搵到間幾理想的單位，最估唔到有份只係五分鐘車程的工係我地未開始揾工時竟然自己搵上門，人工還不差。
After two weeks of winter holiday, we were sitting next to the phone impatiently for two days. It was really dreadful. We thought the offer in Poole was not there anymore. Yet there was an unknown call and it changed everything.
Carl is going to start working the week after next in Scotland as a civilian for the computer system of an aircraft carrier. I am over the moon and excitedly reading all the furniture catalogues, packing, preparing to get moving.
This time last year when Carl decided to leave the Royal Navy, everyone is not quite sure about his decision. Even I was prepared to live on tight budget for a good while until he finds a job. However, he has already had a good few invitations for job interviews before his last pay is given. And two were confirmed. And he is going to start working in a couple of weeks time. We decided to live in Scotland partly because we hope the saving can last longer, yet we found quite a nice cosy flat, and he will be working only a mile from where we live.
Many surprises in life.
To my surprise, I have left Hong Kong for good like that.
To my surprise, Hong Kong is pretty scary now.
To my surprise, I have found someone I can trust and love.
To my surprise, Carl now has a rather good job without any searching.
To my surprise, we will be able to own a few piece of nicer furnitures.
To my surprise, I have a family of my own.
To my surprise, now we can choose where to live, rather than passively waiting to be arranged like the early years. And Carl can even turn down a job.
To my surprise, I have lived almost everywhere in the UK.
To my surprise, I am the lucky one.
After leaving this place, I want to stop lying. While teaching my son not to fear me or anyone, I cannot allow myself keeping my mouth shut when I don’t agree with my family even when it is more convenient. I am sick of being a hypocrite. I am no longer that 5-year-old hiding in the corner because I am scared of being spanked or confronting my parents. I have been to places, I have seen the world and I know quite a few things. I have my grounds to stand on. I can say I don’t agree with people. I hate hearing she says we are so much alike when she is in the good mood and ‘you live your good life and mind your own business’ when I try to tell my point of view. I have been scared of her and compromising for so many years. Enough is enough.
When we talk about the society and the bigger picture, you can only speak in the language of fear and conformation. You would rather speak on the behalf of the suppressors even when you are being suppressed. You can’t control your life, you can’t control the society, you can’t control the economy, but you could control every aspect of my life as a child. Once you have the slightest power you become a suppressor yourself. I will always stand by the side of the weak, the young, the powerless. My school taught us to be the light of the world and the salt of the earth. Even when I am not able to give light and warmth to this world, I will never let myself getting used to living in the dark, let alone defending the evil. Because I will defend the freedom of speaking the truth and freedom itself at all cost, for myself and for anybody.